Self-Confident Men (Part 1)
Men seem confident almost by nature, in fact, confidence ranks among the top features women find attractive, but in reality, confidence and self-confidence may not have much in common.
Men seem particularly concerned with filling needs. It’s a strange way to put it, as women are often hailed as the “care takers” but men want to pay the bills, they want to be seen as dependable, and eventually, most men want partners who feel they take care of them well. Men like hearing “thank you” much more than “why didn’t you?”
Self-confident men know they are taking care of themselves, and anyone else who depends on them, including their cohorts at work. They recognize what they do well, they can identify areas where they need improvement and commit to making realistic progress.
Because men feel most comfortable when they are filling a need, a man with low self-confidence should look at the areas in his life where he doesn’t have that feeling.
Let’s take a look at Ted. Last year he lost his job at a factory where he’d worked for 17 years. He didn’t hobnob with the bosses so he never made it off the line, but he always worked hard and always showed up on time. Ted’s unemployment ran out two months ago, and his wife has been working to support the family ever since. Things around home don’t feel as stable as they once did.
What can Ted do to improve his situation, and enjoy his life that much more?
Recognize what he does do right. He works hard at work. He can work hard at home, and feel good about making life easier on his wife. He is filling a need for her, even if it isn’t as traditional as they are used to.
Ted’s also good at keeping a schedule, so handling the kids’ activities won’t be a hassle. He’s worked on an assembly line, so preparing lunches, book bags, and setting out clothes for the next day won’t be difficult either. He can put his talents to work at home, and during his job search.