I’m sure you’ve witnessed the spirit and self-confidence of a child who is confident she can do anything. Who’s to say that she won’t become a firefighter veterinarian princess when she grows up? Tragically, this indomitable spirit can be lost when faced with difficulties at school or at home.

Bullies can cause a child’s self-confidence to plummet with their constant teasing and torment. First, you should teach your child some tactics for dealing with bullies, such as ignoring the bully and telling an adult. While some children may feel that they’re “tattling,” it’s important for an adult to know that bullying is going on at the school, daycare or other location. If the problem doesn’t stop, be ready to press for a solution. Instead of just complaining, though, consider talking to your child’s school about the feasibility of starting a school-wide anti-bullying program. You might feel hesitant going that far, but it’s worth doing it for the sake of all the bullied children at the school, and even for the sake of the bullies who aren’t learning the proper way to relate to others.

While the very idea of a bully can bring up unpleasant thoughts and memories for parents, they need to be aware that friends can cause just as much heartbreak as bullies for young children. Whether they’re keeping an uncoordinated child out of the recess soccer game or telling secrets in the restroom, friends have the power to lower your son or daughter’s confidence.

You can help by discussing what makes a good friend with your child. This may help keep him away from those who are only out to use or hurt him. If a problem is ongoing, you may want to bring up your concerns with the classroom teacher or with the parents of the offending children.

You may wish to help your child work on conflict resolution skills. You can work through potential situations through role play and discuss the best way to deal with the conflicts that are bound to arise at school or when hanging out with friends. Your child will be happier in the long run, and will also feel more confident in herself for being able to handle small arguments without having to run to an adult for help.

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